Crimson Peak

thumbnail_65dfb950-d461-40fd-bde1-449ac3960c70The last review of this little Halloween horror adventure. A horror film about creepy ghosts, a lunatic with a knife and a helpless idiot, that breaks all the rules of surviving a horror movie, seems the perfect way to end this series. Crimson Peak had all this creepiness and alike bit more.

Crimson Peak is about a young woman Edith, who is hunted by the ghost of her dead mother. Her mother returns from the grave to bring her a warning of Crimson Peak. Although terrified by these ghostly visits, Edith decides to ignore the warnings and give it no more thought.

An English baronet named, Sir Thomas Sharpe appears out of the blue one day, at Edith’s father’s business. After only a few day Edith falls deeply in love with Thomas and after the mysterious dead of her father, she agrees to marry Thomas and move to his stately home in England, in a place known as Crimson Peak. Shortly after moving to Crimson Peak, Edith realises things are not as they seem and quickly discovers a horrifying secret about Thomas and the place called Crimson Peak.

With badly decomposed ghost skeletons jumping out from every corner, this movie should by terrifying. Unfortunately, Crimson Peak falls short of this and is more, creepy than scary. This film starts of good and set a scary tone, but sadly this doesn’t last long and is lost, when the film tries to become a psychological thriller. But before I end up ripping completely into this film, I think I should start with, what was good about this film.

The best thing about this film is the ghosts and the stately house. They’re both creepy as fudge and set a really nice tone for a horror film. The ghosts are these horribly mangled figures, that look more skeleton or zombie like then human. The house, you could not pay me to stay overnight in. It just looks like a place you’d meet a horrible bloody end in and screams haunted house. Perfect for a horror film and setting an eerie tone.

thumbnail_8992c439-92a4-4c04-96a3-7911508f1428When the film finally gets going, the storyline is pretty interesting. Before, Edith goes to Crimson Peak the movies a bit boring and not that interesting. However, when she finally arrives at Crimson Peak, things get very interesting and a very nice mystery is unravelled. Along the way, terrifying ghosts appear everywhere. Seemingly with the intent to hurt Edith. But things are not as they seem and the presence of these ghosts deepen the mystery even more.

Although, Crimson Peak has its good points, it unfortunately also has a lot of bad. I could go on and on about what’s wrong with this film, but that would get boring really fast. So, I’ll just touch on the two biggest problems with this movie. Crimson Peak didn’t seem to know what it wanted to be. It jumps between horror, murder mystery and twisted romance constantly. If this was meant to be a blend of genres, then they blended the genres very badly. At times it seemed like two different movies. One about a murder mystery with creepy ghosts and the other about jealous twisted love triangle. Making the movies direction seem confused and lost at times.

Also, the main character, Edith was incredibly annoying and a complete idiot. Edith receives numerous warnings from a ghost, but pays no attention. A strange guy and his creepy sister show up from nowhere, looking money. Then Edith’s father dies mysteriously after an argument with this guy. But for some crazy reason, Edith still agrees to marry this guy, despite only knowing him for a few days and the fact her father just died. That whole scenario stinks of black widow. More annoying, Edith even comments on the fact that this guy wants to appear to have money, but clearly doesn’t and you would also think she’d be wary of strangers, after being warned about an unfamiliar place. So, what the fudge was this lady at. She clearly has no sense.

When Edith finally gets to Crimson Peak, she just takes the complete biscuit. From doing ridiculously stupid things that always leads to injury or death in horror movies, to letting herself be treated and talked to, worse than a dog. She was clearly missing a back bone and possibly a brain as well. She had so many warnings and opportunities to escape. It was like was she wanted to be killed.

Overall, Crimson Peak was just Okay. It had an interesting mystery and terrifying ghosts, but seemed to missing that one thing that makes for good horror. It was also very confused about its direction and genre and at times was boring and predictable. However, in saying that, it did have some good going for it.

As a film for a Halloween horror binge watch, I would not recommend this movie. There is just so many other better horror films you could watch, that would more suitable and a lot scarier.

Rating: 2/5

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World War Z

thumbnail_53651c8f-5636-4f24-b2f5-396cee4908baNo Halloween venture into the darkness, would be complete without a Zombie or two. In World War Z case, super-fast loud zombies, that can really utilise the power of the zombie pyramid. Pretty terrifying if you ask me. Roof tops aren’t even save from these guys. There’s really no escape from these horrifying creatures. Which makes this film, perfect for a Halloween scare.

World War Z is a zombie apocalypse film, about a retired U.N. investigator called Gerry (although you are given the impression, he was more of a secret agent than investigator). While leaving his children to school with his wife, zombies start attacking the city. Causing mass panic and chaos in the early morning traffic.

Luckily, they escape the speedy zombies and the chaos, and eventually find themselves on a floating military base, with Gerry’s old U.N. buddies. Far from the reach of zombies. Unfortunately, to keep their place in this base, Gerry must come out of retirement and help in the mission to find a cure for the zombie virus. This leads to Gerry jetting around the world, in the search for a cure. While of course fighting and escaping from massive herds of zombies.

I’m a huge fan of zombie films, and World War Z truly didn’t fail to please. But to shake this review up a bit, I’m going to review it in terms of the 5 things I look for in a good zombie film.

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I think I may have gone too far with the cat soup kitties. I might need to balance this out with the cute creepy drawing of the kitties.  

Zombie Quality
Plain and simple, the zombie in World War Z are terrifying. Being faster than the average human, surviving over a hundred feet falls and being surprisingly acrobatic, I would place them in the super zombie category. They also make horrifying noises, that will make your blood run cold. I for one, would absolutely not want to come up against one of these zombies. My baby legs would stand no chance at outrunning one of these guys.
Visually, the zombies look just as terrifying. Although most are computerised, the few that aren’t look incredibly freaky. Kind of like angry walking corpses. Making zombie quality, really good in World War Z.

Story
The storyline is pretty straight forward. Zombies attack, man decides he’ll find cure for zombies, man goes find cure, while avoiding becoming zombie food. It’s pretty basic, but is delivered very well. It gets the balance of action and story just right and has a nice twist near the end. My only criticism is that some of the action scenes move a little too fast, for the eye to keep up with. Meaning these scenes can be slightly confusing and it can be hard to tell, which characters have been taken by zombies.
Also, if you have a fear of flying, I would recommend staying away from this movie. There’s a lot of airplane incidents, that will completely horrify you and feed your fear even more.

Zombie Deaths
Sadly, there is no really good or gory zombie death in this film. I think this film is more about the chase then the kill. Meaning, it’s focused more on people running away from the zombies, then fighting the zombies. Although, there are a few one on one zombie kills, there’s none that really stand out. Making this film pretty disappointing, in terms of zombie deaths.

thumbnail_b10903e2-5c9c-49fb-8df2-8ac93baa5a9aAccuracy
I’m very passionate about microbiology (it one of the few things I miss from my time studying Biomedical science). How scientifically accurate a zombie film is, can be a real deal breaker for me. I don’t expect the writers to be experts, but just to get the basics right and at least know, the difference between bacteria and virus or anything a quick google search could tell them.
Luckily, World War Z was surprisingly accurate and had no crazy scientifically inaccurate comments. Best of all, it showed a very good understanding of microbiology and that they actually did their research. It’s probably one of the more accurate zombie films I’ve seen, making it very nice film in my eyes.

Surprise and Originality
It’s pretty hard to be original when it comes to zombie films. Nearly everything been done before, so the littlest bit of originality goes a long way. World War Z is rather typical of a zombie film; however, I’ve never seen zombie pyramids before and I haven’t quite seen someone travel around the world, during a zombie apocalypse. Its twist was also fairly surprising and somewhat original. Therefore, I would say that, World War Z is original as zombie movies get and will definitely please in this area.

Overall, World War Z is a rather good film. Its action packed and full of excitement, but is still focused on telling an interesting story. It isn’t very gory, yet still manages to make its zombie absolutely terrifying. It’s definitely one of the better zombie films I’ve seen and for this reason, I would highly recommend giving it a watch.

Rating: 4/5

Vampire Hunter D

thumbnail_40227db9-e179-4e51-8e3f-484b538e1305_1With Halloween ever getting nearer, I might as well bring on the horror and start my expedition into the shadows. Horror and anime is not something I’ve really mixed, but I’m all up for new film experiences. So, why not kick of this journey into the darkness, by doing exactly that.

I had a lot to choose from, but any film that promises slithery demons, vampires, hunters and a creepy evil Migi hand, is a film I’m going to want to check out. Vampire Hunter D promised this and delivered so much more.

Set in a dark future, where humans must fend off vampire, demons and other creatures, to survive. A young lady, Doris Lang is attacked by a Noble vampire (Count Magnus Lee) and is bitten. Doris somehow escapes this first attack, but is still at risk from Count Lee, as he plans on kidnapping Doris and forcing her to become his bride.

Suspecting Count Lee will come for her again. Doris hires a mysterious stranger known as D, to hunt down Count Lee and kill him, before he can attack her again. This leads to a series of bloody events, as D enters Count Lee’s lair and set out to save Doris Lang.

To be honest, Vampire Hunter D (1985) is quite a bit older than myself and has some of the typical problems of anime from that time. Such as bad dubbing, weirder shaped heads and random nudity. So, to be fair when rating this anime, I’ll overlook these problems. It just what 80’s animation is like and isn’t isolated to Vampire Hunter D alone.

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Despite being an older anime, Vampire Hunter D was actually pretty good and had a half decent storyline. Granted it didn’t wow me to a great extent, but was still very watchable and had a good element of mystery and excitement. It very nicely unravelled, the mystery surrounding D and managed to capture my attention right up until the end. Making it very enjoyable to watch.

Vampire Hunter D also had a nice amount of gore, which is always a bonus for any horror fan. In addition to this, it had a good share of unintentional comical moments. Including scenes that look, all so wrong and that could be hilariously misconstrued as something else. If you’re as immature and dirty minded as I, you’ll have great fun with this movie. Particularly the ending scene, where characters shout “I love D” from a hill-top. I’m not even joking, they actually shouted that. Makes you wonder how the hell, they let that one slip without noticing and if it’s unintentional, at all.

I think the biggest selling point of this film, is the Mysterious D himself. As vampire hunters go, D’s pretty kick ass. If I was a vampire and heard, D was coming to whip my butt. I wouldn’t sit around sniggering and acting pretentious, like Count Lee. I’d be shaking the kittens from my trouser legs and heading to the nearest airport. D just made mincemeat of whoever stood in his way, without much effort. Not to mention, he sounds like Liam Neeson in Taken.

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Blast from the past. You might recognise this drawing. It’s the first vampire drawing, I did for this blog. I occasionally like to throw an oldie into my posts, for nostalgia purposes.

Like all films, Vampire Hunter D has its short coming. Its biggest being, the huge plot holes and things that didn’t make sense. For example, if D could kill Count Lee that easy, why the hell did he not kill Lamika and the mutant, the first time he fought them. He could have saved himself a butt kicking later on, as well as a lot of time and bother. It also would have sent one hell of message to Count Lee. It would have made it very clear to Count Lee, that he would have to be prepared to die, if he wanted to take Doris.

Another rather annoying aspect of this anime is the flashes. They were a bit excessive with the flashing lights, in Vampire Hunter D. The odd flash of light is fine in a film, but not whole sequences lasting minutes. I felt like I was at a 90’s nightclub and my eyes were starting to sting, from looking at the blinding light. I like being able to see after watching a movie, so this really wasn’t good.

Overall, Vampire Hunter D was good for an old anime horror movie. However, in saying that, if you dislike old anime, you’ll probably not enjoy this film. It’s very typical of 80’s anime and if this isn’t too you’re taste, then Vampire Hunter D will not impress you much. On the other hand, if like me, you have a soft point for older anime and love horror, Vampire Hunter D is worth checking out. It would make for the perfect start, to a horror or old anime binge watch. It has a real creepy weird feel to it, that is great for putting you in the mood for more horror.

Rating: 3/5

Sorry this post, was so long coming. I originally was going to review Akira, but after watching it I realised it was a massive hint at something else. Although I did really enjoy Akira, reviewing it would have turned into a deep analysis of the film.
To do this properly, I would have had to re-watch Akira a few times and had to pull apart some of the scenes, to explain its hidden clues and its hints at other things. Basically, Akira was making so many hints, it would have taken me ages to collect and analyse them all and the review would have been so long, I fear it would put people of reading it. So, I had to find something else to review, last-minute.

Don’t Knock Twice

thumbnail_68373002-a7bf-43ac-9889-3eb624f4b931I really don’t know what I was thinking, when I decided to watch Don’t Knock Twice. There are so many other horrors, I could have watched instead. But I suppose, by watching extremely bad horror, you learn to appreciate good horror. So, I’ll try to refrain from ripping into “Don’t Knock Twice” too much, in this review.

Don’t knock twice, is about a woman trying to regain custody of her daughter. However, before this can happen, her daughter knocks on a dead witch’s door twice. This somehow summons a demon, that’s hell-bent (King of Cheese strikes again) on capturing her daughter and devouring her completely. The mother must now do everything she can to save her daughter from the demon’s grasp.

The storyline of this film is incredibly messy, making the whole movie one big confusing jumble of nowhere sub-plots, that make no sense and have nothing to do with the outcome of the film. This film literally has no direction. It’s just all over the place. It drifts from one nowhere sub-plot to another and in the end, returns to its first one. All while making a poor attempt at a twist in the main plot, which was so obvious a one-eyed mole wearing a blindfold, could have seen it coming.

To add to this messy storyline, there was extreme badly Frankensteined scenes (a big pet peeve of mine). With the amount of teleporting the 2 main characters did, in the biggest scene of the film. I was starting to think, they themselves were witches and not just Ginger. It was just awful. The 2 characters actually swapped places, at one point. Leaving me to wonder, how on earth no one noticed that, before the film was released.

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 A flaming flower. Some of my abstract art, to brighten up this review.

I think the most annoying thing about this film, was its psychic impulsive characters. Characters just magically knew things, without any sort of research or logical thought. At one point, the mother randomly decided to burn all the doors in the house, without having any sort of reason for doing so. Like nowhere in this movie did it say or suggest, that the demon needed a door to manifest. It had literally just appeared behind people numerous times, by this point. So, what on earth was this woman at. The demon clearly didn’t need a door. There was a lot of this sort of thing in Don’t knock twice, which was very annoying.

As I can’t let myself be completely negative, I had to find something good about this film (which was extremely hard). I suppose the witch aspect was interesting, even though it didn’t make for good horror. I only wish, they had gone into a bit more detail on witches and gave Ginger (the witch) a stronger backstory. They essentially just said she was a witch, even though she never really done anything witchy and was pretty much, just a demon’s slave.

I’ve watched a lot of bad horror films and have always been able to enjoy them, on some level. Whether that be, finding humour in its cheesiness or the irony of how not scary and fake/forced everything is. But with Don’t knock twice, I found it hard to enjoy anything about it. The whole witch thing, just didn’t work well and them trying to throw a demon into mix, just reflects this. They should have really stuck with one and maybe this film would have had some sense of direction. For this reason, I would suggest not wasting your time with this film. I personally wish, I had watched something better instead.
Rating: 1/5 (and I’m being incredibly generous)

Surviving a Horror Movie (Demon/Evil Spirits)

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Why not to trust your demon butler. He’ll creep on you, while you sleep. 

It’s rather obvious, that horror is my favourite genre. If it’s spooky and dark, I’m all over it. Since I had so much fun creating the zombie 101 post, for surviving a zombie apocalypse. I thought it be fun to create something similar, for surviving a demon/evil spirit horror movie.

I have a bit of a fascination with demons and evil spirit films. I’ve watched more than I care to admit. It’s one of the very few types of horror, that actually scares me. Which has led to me, doing some demon research (I know more on the subject of demons, then I ought too). But don’t worry, I’m not one of those chicken bones and drawing on the ground with chalk people (That stuff is too scary for me). I just like having a plan of action, in case I’m ever locked in a haunted house, filled with blood lusting ghost or demons.

Since I can’t use my demon knowledge, to tell you guys how to obtain a demon butler, I’ll share a few tips for surviving a demon horror movie. But first I’ll set the scene.

How to survive the demon house:

You’ve just been kicked out of your home, by the homeowner association, for not having green enough grass. You’re desperately searching for another place to live, when you come across an old suspiciously cheap mansion. Having no real choice (because you’ve been black listed by every homeowner community for miles, for abusing your grass), you jump on the opportunity without asking questions or doing any research.

Feeling chuffed for, getting a just a great deal, you move in. But on your first night in the house, things start happening. Scary unexplainable things, like the walls start bleeding, a creep doll keeps leaving you notes, wrote in red crayon and there’s a strange creature in your basement. At this point, you realise you’ve been taken for a fool and are in extreme danger. You’re now in dire need of some tips, for surviving your time in the demon house.

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The creepiest building, I could find. An abandoned women’s prison. I would not like to spend a night in there. Unfortunately, it’s in the middle of a city and on the junction of death. So, the only safe way of getting photos, is while driving past at quiet hours. Otherwise, I would have been ran over a few dozen times.  

1. Leave house and never look back- Seems like a no brainer, but no one in a horror movie ever comes up with this idea. They always have some ridiculous excuse, for why they can’t leave the house. I would highly recommend, this be your first call of action and second to be, destroy the house. But to keep this list going let’s just say, you also have a ridiculous excuse, like it’s raining and cold outside.

2. Don’t go crazy and throw holy water around the place or start to burning sage- This never ends well. It just makes the demon madder and hell-bent on destroying you. If you think about it logically, you can see why. In the demon’s mind, the house is their space. If someone comes into your space, throwing water and stinking the place out. You’re going to get mad and do everything you can, to make that person leave. The same goes with religious items. These are probably offensive to the demon and will make it furious. Essentially, don’t do anything to annoy the demon. It won’t end well.

3. Trap it in a coconut- This one sounds a bit weird, but in some cultures, it’s believed that you can trap spirits and demons inside coconuts. All you have to do is trick the demon and get it to go inside the coconut. Once in there, it can’t get out again, so problem solved. There’s a lot of variations in, what to do with the coconut afterwards. But you can worry about that, after the demon is in the coconut.

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This is why I very rarely use colour. I tend to go a bit mad and create something like this.  

4. If you hear a loud bang, definitely do not go check it out. Just run in the opposite direction- The curious person always goes first in horror movies. Curiosity really does kill the cat, when it comes to horror movies. If you’re in a possessed house and hear a bang, its most likely a demon having, one hell of a hissy fit. Best just to tuck your tail between your legs and run in the other direction. You don’t want to get caught up in a demonic tantrum.

5. Ring of salt- You’ve survived this long, but sadly you ignored tip 2 and did something to angry the demon. The demon manifests and charges straight for you. You look for a way to escape, but the demon has you cornered. Suddenly you remember, you have a large shaker of salt in your pocket (You were cruelly melting slug earlier and forgot to return the shaker to the kitchen). You quickly grab the shaker and form a circle of salt around you. The salt stops the demon in its tracks. It furiously waves its claws at you, but is unable to reach you. Laughing, you use the shaker again and form a ring around the demon. As long as the ring of salt isn’t broken, the demon is trapped inside. Just keep the ring of salt topped up and your safe from the demon’s grasp.

6. Do not talk to the demon- The quickest way to get possessed in a horror movie, is to talk to the demon. So, don’t get angry and start shouting stuff at the demon. Definitely don’t try bargaining with it either. For some reason, communication makes demons stronger and enables their possession abilities.

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Close up of the prison. I wasn’t driving, that would be dangerous. Cars are right-hand drive here, so this probably looks really bizarre to some people.   

 7. Find some demon fighting weapons- If you’ve studied your myths and legends hard enough, you’ll know that there’s a couple of weapons, you can use to defeat a demon. These include a sword, a spears and shields. However, being of myths and legends these items will be near impossible to find. But don’t worry, there is something else you can use from Irish mythology. According to Irish mythology, iron burns fairies, evil spirits and demons. So, all you need to do is hit that demon, with an iron bar or pot, until it runs in terror or no longer exist.

8. Scary the kittens out of that demon, with a warrior mask- I’m not 100% sure, what these masks are called, but they’re found all over the world (like in China, Africa and among Pagan and Celtic artefacts). However, the idea of these masks is always the same. You wear the mask or leave it, somewhere for the demon to find. The demon sees the mask and is so horrified, it goes back to, wherever the hell it came from.

9. Find Professor Snape – You’ve tried everything and there’s still a demon in your life, hell-bent on destroying everything that is you. To be honest it doesn’t get much worse, than having a demon after your soul. So, you might as well start looking into the dark arts or more specifically defence against the dark arts. You might as well, find yourself a magic man or a witch and see if they can destroy the demon. At worse, you get to see a really cool magical demonic fight, before your completely consumed by a demon.

10. Call ghostbusters- If all else fails, you’re in the world of film. Call ghostbusters, they’ll sort that demon out. See if they’re true to their word. See if they really are afraid of no ghost, even the murderous demonic ones.

Zombie 101

e94272cc-b7a3-426d-abd7-45a767129f2fHaving watched zombie movies back to back all weekend, as part of zombie week. I’ve noticed something all zombie movies have it common (other than zombies). The characters in these movies, all are completely rubbish at surviving. Yes, I know some are hard-core zombie slayers. But when it comes to basic survival common sense, it seems to be lost on them.

If these characters were real, I doubt they would survive a weekend camping, let alone a zombie apocalypse. With the stuff they pull and the horrible decision they make, like taking on a whole herd of zombies single-handed. They should be zombie food at the beginning of the movie. But then we wouldn’t have a movie.

So, with that in mind, I created a list on how to survive a zombie apocalypse and not get eaten. (This is not a serious list and is just my opinion. Therefore, if you need survival advice, seek the advice of a professional survivalist)

1. Stay up high. You can’t get eaten, if those zombies can’t reach you. I don’t know how many zombie films I’ve watched, were night falls and they set up camp. Then just sleep on the ground. How stupid can you get? Yeah, pretty sure you would get eaten if you did that.
Sleeping high up in a tree or on a flat roof top, is a much better idea, if you don’t want to be eaten. All you need is a bit of rope ensure you can’t fall to your death. If your planning to stay long-term, you can always build a tree house for shelter or build a camp on a flat roof. The roof top would also give you room to grow food (if you can get grow-bags up there), well out of reach of zombies. Plus, you never have to worry about herds, you can wait them out, on the roof tops.

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The walking dead cup (my favourite cup)

2. Wear clothing zombies can’t bite through, like motorbike gear and leather. Zombies can’t eat you, if their teeth can’t bite through your clothing. This also prevents being bitten by those sneaky zombies, that hide down low.

3. Don’t break open locked doors. They are locked for a reason. That reason most likely being, a huge, hungry zombie locked inside. Open that door and you’re zombie food. In zombie movies, there’s always that one idiot that insists on opening that suspicious locked door and gets everyone eaten.

4. Watch your feet and stay alert. Some many deaths happen because no one looks were they are standing and watches out for hidden zombies. It’s just a shame, no one sees that zombie, causally sitting there on the ground, waiting for its next meal to walk past. It’s so obvious, but they’re too busy looking at that zombie in the distance, to notice one sitting right at their feet.

bcab1a8a-28a4-4478-8f97-d4c6b70d622f5. Keep a dog or 2 around. Not only would they keep spirits up, but they can smell dead things from miles away. Train a dog to signal when a zombie is near and you have your own zombie sniffer dog. What better way to avoid zombies and not get eaten. Dogs can also be used to hunt, for warmth, to find food and for protection from thugs.

6. Don’t rely on canned foods. Everyone will be fighting each other for canned food, so it could get dangerous. Canned food will also eventually run out, so growing food would make you a target, for other survivors. Storing food will also make you a huge target and could get you killed. A much better option is hunting and gathering. If you’re not such what’s eatable, get a book on foraging from a library or book store (probably the least likely place to run into zombies).

7. Stay away from that sick or injured person. This sounds like a no brainer, but in zombie films, they always stupidly go help, without taking any precautions. A short while later the person turns and tries to eat everyone. They could have at least tied the person up, for peace sake. It’s as if they want to be eaten.

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Coconut Head. Left alone in a car, with a notebook and a pen. Doodling bound to happen. Don’t like drawing in pen, though. You can’t erase and you’re stuck with whatever you draw.        

8. Don’t trust that random guy, that turns up from nowhere, promising shelter and safety. Seems like common sense, but no. In the films, they all follow that nice stranger to his camp, where they are attacked, robbed or imprisoned. So, if a stranger offers to take you to their camp, ran for your life, in the opposite direction, as fast as you can.

9. Avoid large groups. Large groups only attract herds of zombies. Plus, it’s much harder to find enough food to feed a large group, so you’ll most likely go hungry. A small group of 3 or 4, is much better. There’s enough eyes, to watch out for zombie and enough hands to fend them off. It is also much easier to find enough food for 3 or 4 people.

10. If trapped by zombies, with no way out, play zombie. Sounds silly, but always works in the movies and I can see why. They are zombies, not geniuses. If you look, smell and act like a zombie, they won’t be able to tell the difference. So, if you find yourself trapped, quickly smother yourself in zombie juice, pull your best zombie pose and limp the hell out of there.

Before I Wake

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Evil Butterflies (A.K.A Moths)

Where can I watch this: Netflix (Netflix original)

Thanks for the nightmare fuel, Netflix. My sleep deprivation and sleep paralysis has gotten a hell of a lot more interesting after watching this. Watching alone in the dark, was a really bad idea, on my behalf. I scared the bananas out of myself.

This movie got me on two levels. One, it fed the fear of being attacked by something horribly terrifying, while completely unable to move or scream.  And two, being chased and eaten alive, by something that can appear and disappear at well, is possibly the scariest thing I can think of.

If you’re not a nervous wreck and don’t jump at your own shadow, you most likely won’t find Before I wake that scary. For anyone with sleep paralysis, I would definitely not recommend this movie. It’ll just give your brain a new terrifying creature, to torment you with while it holds you captive in your bed.

Overall, Before I wake isn’t that bad. It’s about a boy, with the ability to bring his dreams to life, while he sleeps. The boy’s mother dies when he is very young, so he ends up in foster care. He is eventually fostered by a couple, whose son drowned to death in their bath tube. The couple soon discover the boy’s ability and instead of bringing him to a sleep therapist, like any caring guardian would do. The mother figure in this relationship, decides to become an emotional parasite and forces the boy to dream about her dead son. To allow her to see and spend time with, what she thinks is her dead son.

f01937c0-bf23-4670-ae15-3670ed0e86aeThe boy is obviously terrified of his dreams and his ability. At one point, he even tells the mother figure that, he is scared and doesn’t want to sleep because there’s a monster in his dreams, that eats people. Again, instead of bringing the child to a therapist, the emotional parasite and her husband enabler, decides to expose the child to mental abuse, forcing him to watch home videos of their dead son. This abuse gets worse, leading to the emotional parasite drugging the poor boy, so that he would sleep for longer. Giving her more time with a dream vision of her dead son.

But then Karma strikes, and the monster from the child’s dreams, finally turns up to (in my opinion) save the child from this messed up abuse. Unfortunately, the monster only eats the enabler and the emotional parasite survives the attack.

After the attack, the boy is rightfully removed from the couple’s care, because the child was drugged, the husband is missing and they suspected domestic violence. The emotional parasite is left alone without either of her hosts. Feeling insecure, vulnerable and peeved that her host was removed from her care, she finally decides to act in the child’s best interest and do something that benefits the child for a change. The mother figure then sets out to find out the truth behind the boy’s abilities and to find a way to rid the boy of the monster from his dreams.

Although it sounds like I hated this movie, it wasn’t that bad. It was more annoying that the mother figure was treating the boy horribly and it was kind of made out to be an okay thing to do (it’s definitely not okay. It’s pretty sick). The movie itself was okay. It was just that character’s behaviour that was irritating.

Before I wake isn’t that scare, so could be watched by lovers of horror and by those who like watching the occasional horror. If you are lost for something to watch on Netflix, I would definitely recommend giving Before I wake a try. You never know you might like it more than I did.
Rating: 2/5

Curse of Sleeping Beauty

2b2956f5-e298-4ab4-a222-be69ff28f943Where can I watch this: Netflix

When I first came across this on Netflix and thought it was a chick flick about some guy saving a girl (the usual Sleeping beauty story). I was so wrong. It turned out to be a horror and lets just say I can’t go near shop mannequins anymore, without feeling uneasy.

This movie was actually about a man (Thomas) who is mysteriously left everything in the will of an uncle, he never even knew he had (including a house). The house turns out to be full of spirits (Jinn) and dark forces, so things quickly take a dark turn after Thomas moves in. Thomas keeps having the same dream about a beautiful women that can not be woken due to a curse. He believes she is trapped by evil spirits somewhere in his late uncles house and sets out to fight against the spirits, find his sleeping beauty and remove the curse with a kiss.

Overall I felt this movie was okay, however is not the best horror movie I’ve seen. The movie was still really really creepy (mainly due to those darn mannequins), but was not that scary. The storyline wasn’t that great either and it was slow at times. In saying this, the movie had one hell of a twist at the end, that I never seen coming.  Despite it’s short coming, it still had a lot going for it and a lot of good points, like it creepiness (I was very very creeped out after watching this movie and was pretty much on the look out for shady looking mannequins). I would say I would recommend this movie to those who don’t enjoy being terrified by a movie, but still likes watching horrors.                                        Rating 2.5/5